The last couple of months I have often been overwhelmed with gratitude. I stay up all day the majority of each week instead of sleeping half the day every day because I now have the energy and desire to do so. I exercise in various ways throughout the week, including playing basketball, my physical therapy exercises, walks, and biking. I finally graduated with my Bachelor's degree from Utah State University after 7 long years of taking classes on and off. I have done a bit of gardening in between rain storms and am going to mow the lawn for the first time in my life this weekend. On Wednesday I met with my physical therapist, who told me I have no restrictions now. I am free to exercise however I want, to run, play sports, and most importantly, kick a soccer ball. I did that tonight. As soon as my foot touched the ball to kick it back to Sophie, I screamed in pure delight and started started crying tears of joy. In that moment I knew it was all worth it. The countless trips to the Emergency Room, the many surgeries, and the years of pain all led up to that joyous moment when I stopped the soccer ball with my foot.
Two of my favorite scriptures talk of joy. The first is found in 2 Nephi 2:23, "... having no joy, for they knew no misery..." The second is Psalm 30:5, "...weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning." Both of these scriptures came to mind tonight as I reflected on how I wouldn't have felt that incredible happiness kicking a soccer ball if I hadn't also felt the incredible pain and misery from all the health problems that plagued me the last 6 years. I have been strengthened by the Savior countless times in my life and am never truly grateful for it until that morning of joy comes. I've thought about what I would say if someone ever asked me if I wanted to erase the last 6 years. My answer would be a resounding NO! Simply because I wouldn't be thankful, happy, or joyful now if I hadn't been frustrated, miserable, and in pain then.
I know life going forward won't be easy, it never is, but I am thankful for a Savior who not only felt all my pain and suffering, but also all my joy. I am never truly alone and I hope you all know that you are not either!
Love,
Kenzie
Please enjoy the following video (filmed by Sophie) of me experiencing that true joy.
